My horoscope says I'll win the lottery...

 Although I know it's "stuff and nonsense" quoth my mom, reading astrology forecasts can often be a self-indulgent, egocentric form of entertainment that can lift your spirits, make you laugh and generally make you feel better about yourself.  Sometimes, I get the urge to see how many horoscopes I can find online whose predictions are similar enough to make me believe (or hope) that things might just be going my way.

Well, yesterday I did such a search and came up with some very compelling forecasts that concern my financial future.  Apparently in the entire month of May and the beginning of June, Mars will be moving in it's most strongest orbit (what?) in Leo (that's me) which means money matters will show a marked improvement.

I was recently laid off and have since run into some difficulties surrounding my application for unemployment.  I thought to myself, "This must mean that I will finally start receiving my unemployment checks!"

But how very un-glamorous is that? 

Then it hit me...maybe I am going to inherit a large amount of cash or perhaps I will win the lottery!  Dreams of my status as a millionaire formed quickly due to my over-active imagination and I was stunned into silence while my thoughts perused the endless possibilities available to those who are filthy rich.  But suddenly, my reverie popped like sticky, chewing gum bubble in my face.  How can I win the lottery if I don't play?

Actually, I've never played the lottery (gasp). I know, I know...how could someone have NEVER bought a lottery ticket? It's simple really, the crazy odds just never appealed to me and I hate gambling.  So, since the stars above (and the planets) have come together to grant me this financial boon, I felt it was like cheating fate if I didn't go out and buy a ticket right away.

Believe it or not, I called my friend to ask her how to go about purchasing a lottery ticket so I wouldn't feel like a moron walking into the gas station.  After she recovered from her shock, she told me I could either choose the numbers or do a quick pick where the machine chooses for you.  Then she proceeded to list all the different lotteries I could play...I felt overwhelmed!

Luckily, when I got inside the gas station, there were only two choices; Louisiana State Lottery and the Powerball.  I asked for a quick pick for both lotteries (better safe than sorry?) and, if I do say so myself, acted pretty professional about it.  The cashier never would have guessed I was a lotto newbie...that is, unless, the light of excitement in my eyes gave it away.

So now I have two tickets for the drawings this Wednesday.  The Powerball is at $145 million and the Lotto is at $950,000.  Wish me luck? Nevermind...it's written in the stars!